I believe that everything happens for a reason. That every choice / decision / path you take points you in the direction you were ultimately meant to go. That all experiences added together shapes the person who you are. And that whether you choose to be positive, or negative, is up to you.
In my art practice I take pride in painting custom artwork for clients, and the ability to paint commissions in many different styles. I enjoy translating a vision or idea to a painted canvas for them. But…lately I’ve been feeling like something has been missing with my art, something that went so under the radar that I didn’t even realize it was on hiatus… Then once I put my finger on it, it scared me to realize it’s been at least two years since I’ve done it.
What was it you ask? Painting for myself. Paint just to paint. No guidelines. No thinking about if it’s “sellable”. Paint without a plan in mind. Just LET GO! See where the brushes take me. Embrace spontaneity on the canvas.
Please don’t misunderstand though – I love working on commissions with clients, painting specific pieces just for them! I am very grateful for this and I never take it for granted!! But on a personal and self-reflective note, I realize it’s time to add spontaneous painting for myself back into the mix as well.
I realize now that I hadn’t been giving into the moment, not painting what I want to paint when I want to paint it. This type of scenario had become a regular occurrence it seems. Convincing myself into and out of situations. Over thinking. And quite frankly not being excited to start a new piece just for fun, for just me. Not sure how this became the norm… but I’m glad it finally clicked so I could consciously move in the direction I’d like to go.
So it’s time for a change. Time to let loose… start giving in to the ‘creative brain’, and hit pause on the ‘planning brain’. (There’s a healthy balance and use for each of course, but you know what I mean haha.) Time to embrace the urge to grow as an artist, time to expand my mind, soak up new techniques, throw caution to the art-related wind when it comes to my own non-comission paintings! This… I haven’t done for a long long time.